Porsche 911 Turbo S 992 – No Jargonauts Here!
Porsche has become a victim of naming cliché. This problem occurs when your flagship product is the “Turbo.” Yup, that’s the really beastly 911 from the past with bags of power and is a household name in Porsche circles. The new 992 911 Turbo S doesn’t disappoint with it’s 640HP.
However, when the whole vehicle range now features a turbocharged engine, things start to get a little watered down – isn’t everything now a Porsche Turbo? To add clarity, Porsche thought it was a brilliant idea to call the all new electric Taycan a Turbo as well! So, everything is a turbo, not! The new 992 911 Turbo S is, but then again, so is everything else, mostly – clear?
Confused? OK, so every car has a turbo engine, but only the cars with Turbo on the badge are the 911 Turbos – but wait, the Taycan doesn’t work in that scenario because it’s all electric, but has the turbo badge. Ah, yes well…we don’t want to let go of the past now do we? It’s possible the new Macan Turbo S will also be all electric!
A Lack of Jargonauts
We live in a corporate world powered by social media, acronyms, lofty words or over-elaborate sentences! Much of this is driven by jargonauts – these are people who have been promoted up the corporate ladder by using a wonderful concoction of nonsense to state straightforward things.
Everything needs an acronym; they can’t contact you, they “reach out;” they can’t agree with you, but they will admit “their vision and goals are somewhat aligned with yours;” they can’t just get on and do something, they “action the key deliverables.”
Try this in German, and you end up with some extremely long sentences and excruciatingly long words that probably make you look like a complete fool! Hence the Porsche problem – clearly a lack of people driving new acronyms, names and phrases – not enough jargonauts!
So Why Keep Using a 1970s Technology Name?
Porsche first introduced the 911 T in 1975. The “T,” signified the turbocharger hardware that promised more power and performance. Then the Turbo S first appeared as a limited run of tweaked versions towards the end of a model lifecycle. However, the 1990s saw the Turbo S model become the much more prominent and highly marketed flagship model for the 911 range.
Then in 2015, Porsche introduced the 991.2 generation of the 911s. The most fundamental change was that every 991.2 911 now had a turbocharged engine, regardless of whether it said Carrera or Turbo on the back. Right away everything was a turbo, although only certain models received the turbo badge.
Suddenly, the word Turbo no longer means turbo charged engine, it just means that the car with the turbo badge is faster and more expensive than the cars without the turbo badge! “Turbo” is now merely a model name and an indicator of bells and whistles.
A quick search on Amazon reveals just about anything that moves from drills to blenders and toasters has a “turbo” version. Turbo went from being about the technical delivery of power through turbocharging technology, to now being all about the cliché of the “Turbo” badge.
Porsche is not a company that goes for big change often. If something works, why change it – just update it. Porsche is best known for building the same rear engine coupe with the same styling and handling characteristics, for more than 60 years – although that might be changing. As a result, it maybe isn’t a shock that they have to hang–on to the turbo badge. However, it now seems like it’s time to forget the cliche, especially when even your handy battery-operated drill has a turbo badge as well!
Who Wants a Marathon Bar?
So, Porsche builds a revolutionary all electric vehicle and opens a whole new hyper technology market. Then, with a single stroke of genius, it chooses to slap a 1970s label on the back – Taycan Turbo S. If the idea with the Taycan was about letting go of the old gas engine technology and trying something new, why use the combustion engine turbo badge? Unquestionably, this was the time for a new acronym or name that could be beamed out over social media. Opportunity missed!
I mean seriously – Marathon became Snickers, Datsun became Nissan, Opal Fruits became Starburst – surely, it’s time to dump turbo!
Porsche needs a new word or acronym for the turbo models. It’s time Porsche brought in a few jargonauts – “we’re going to need to see if we can find a window of opportunity in the calendar to have an ideation meeting and align our visions and goals, such that we can action the key deliverables on the turbo naming thingy.”
“Wir werden sehen müssen, ob wir im Kalender eine Gelegenheit finden, ein Ideentreffen abzuhalten und unsere Visionen und Ziele so auszurichten, dass wir die wichtigsten Ergebnisse auf dem Turbo-Namensding umsetzen können” as they say in Germany!
Suggestions on a postcard to Porsche A.G., Stuttgart etc etc.